Joe Hasham said I looked Thai/ South American!! *Laughs*

Went to see the Causeway play held at The Actors Studio in Bangsar Shopping Centre at 3pm with Fadia. It was a collaborative effort between Singapore’s Teater Ekamatra and Malaysia’s The Actors Studio. Since it was in Malay, I had my reservations about it. But then Michelle kept telling me how good it was and all that – and I didn’t have any idea if she was good in reviewing plays or not, what with it being in Malay, which she doesn’t speak much! Plus she was the one in charge of the costumes, so promotion perhaps? – so I decided to give it a try. It was free after all, hehe, courtesy of Michelle.

*Dances around the room and drowns between the cushions on the sofa*

It’s Sunday. And Sunday is after Friday. What was on Friday? It was the due date for my Management assignment. And also the day before my 1 week holz started. *Tumbles around in happiness*

Huaaarrghhh I finally finished that assignment. Damn piece of shit, if you must know. Was at it the whole of Thursday. The moment I hit the 1500 range, my brain went slow-mo. Kept going online to disturb the others (they are mostly in the hostel and so are online practically 24/7), comparing word count and all that shit. Haha. And Isil, that amazing woman, was at 300 at 3am! Gosh. Anyway so I continued my work till mum got up. She shooed me off to bed at 8am, not without me continuously reminding her that I gotta get up at 10am to continue the work. Sad life I got there, eh? Done by 2.30pm. Wait, not yet taste freedom as yet. There’s the printing and the journey to college. I clicked to print, white paper went through the printer. White paper came out. Totally white. *pulls hair* Blady hell… my ink finished!! This meant that I couldn’t take the bus to college becoz I need time to print there… taking the bus would mean me arriving just before 5pm. Argghh.. blew 20 bucks on the cab. Argghhh..

Met Aishath and Payal as soon as I got to our table in the cafetaria. Aishath followed me to the labs to print coz my account was near zero and so I needed someone with enough printing credits to help me. Met Aimann there as he was printing out his assignment too (he’s doing Biotech) and guess what? He showed me the printmaster window which had this really #@$! long list of people who were queuing up to print. Argghhh. I got a com anyhow just to try my luck. But the only available coms could not be used for printing. Argghhhh. Who can help me now? Called Radit! After telling him my predicament, he asked me to email him the file. Goodie good! I got out of there as soon I e-mailed him and walked towards the hostel. At the security guard house, the guard asked me what I wanted to do in the hostel (visiting hours starts at 6pm only and it was 4 then). Usually they just ask and I just answer that I was gonna see management. But this time I was given this form for the manager to sign, as evidence that I saw him. Aiyo. Called Radit and asked him how now…he said just tell the manager I wanted to go up to see him. Ok. Explained myself to the manager and he asked what floor I was going to. I answered 3rd and his face changed. Haha. Girls’ floor starts at 12th. And then he gave me this short lecture of how I must not enter the room coz if I do and the security guard comes, my friend would be kicked out of the hostel blablablaaaaa. Nodded and proceeded upstairs. Met Kenny in the lift and got teased. Did I enter the room? Of course la!! Nobody follows the rules anyway hahaha. Got my stuff, and he had the decency to print out the cover sheet for me too. Really wanted to sit awhile on his bed coz I was on virtual energy then, but he had a friend over who was sitting there, so I just got my stuff and ciao-ed after saying so many thank yous to him. Oh and he told me he would get Coldplay’s new album for me from Singapore during the holz if he had enough cash. I was supposed to pay him but mum denied me money. Thank you thank you thank youuuuuuu…

AND I PASSED IT UP ON TIME!!

I seriously put up my hands in the air as I walked out of the Monash reception. Hehe.

Waited for others to be done with theirs, and headed to the Pink Shop (this western shop that was painted pink) for lunch. I don’t remember when was the last I ate. Hehe. Met Kenneth, Sugianti and Rose there. While eating, the heavens opened up and drenched Sunway. Aiyoooo. We managed to slip to college when it died down, but still got wet. Went to the Monash Lounge to play pool and fooseball but both the pool tables were occupied and the fooseball was off limits coz the table tennis club was in session. Milton, my MUFY junior, was playing at one of the pool tables with his friend so he asked me and Sara to join them during the next game and play team style. After all the introductions, it was Me-Milton against William-Sara. We lost. Haha. Was introduced to another friend of theirs who came by, Osama (yes, his name is Osama). Nice fella. I knew about him before I met him coz his life story is so sad. He was in WMU’s program and was about to leave for the US when the September 11 thing happened. So his visa didn’t get approved and he was stuck here. He tried to enter Monash but couldn’t coz he’s a Pakistani and Monash only allow Pakistanis with a Bachelor’s degree in. So now he’s with VUT doing it all over again. Sad, huh? He was surprised I knew him. Hey, with a story like that, how not to? Hehe.

After getting bored of pool, we headed to Aishath’s place to hang out and then go for dinner at RSB. Sara and me decided to bunk over at her place that night. Playstation 2 came into the equation hahahaha. Eka followed us to dinner. Whilst sitting and yakking, I looked up and saw Abe walking by with his friend. Yes. Oh. My. God. He’s on holz, why still in Sunway?? I messaged him and he joined us later on, which was weird coz he never joins me and my friends. Seems that Sunway is his getaway vacation thingy hahaha. Yak yak yak. We parted as we left the place. Accompanied Eka to the hostel and then went to Aishath’s. Played PS 2 till 4am then slept till 12pm. Aishath and her sister made breakfast, which was filling. Played some more. Hahaha. Most of the time it was Tekken 3/Quake 3/Nascar/Gran Turismo. Oh Aishath’s GT driving is ba-a-a-dddd. Hahahaha we all laughed like shit when we saw the video replay hahahahaha. Damn hahahaha.

Wanna know how bad we all were physically? The 4 of us were on the 2 beds playing, and if any of us were not playing at the moment, we were sleeping. Haha. And it rained. Sheesh. And worst of all, I had Nattie’s wedding dinner reception to attend, which I so badly wanted to go to coz it’s a Eurasian wedding, meaning good music, good food and good guys to look at. But the others were like “How are you gonna go when you keep
dozing off on the bed?” Hahaha. I’m so dead. I left the place at 4.30 pm and reached home 2 hours later to tell my mum I wasn’t going. She saw me and agreed. I bought my lunch cum dinner at the mamak stall, at which I was asked why I looked so tired haha. The others left and I went to sleep at 8pm. Got up at 2am and got bored so I came online and I blogged. Hehe. This entry is too long right? Nevermind. Hahaha.

And I’m happy coz I saw him on Friday, after not going to college since Tuesday. Blegh.

Tomorrow I’m going to watch Causeway at The Actor’s Studio in Bangsar with Fadia!! Fadia Fadia Fadiaaaaa. Haven’t seen her since the last holz for the local universities. Thanks Michelle for the tickets!! *Muakss*

Reason for me being awake at this ungodly hour on a school nite - Management assignment - 2500 words - due Friday - so far done 817 words - i've decided to skip tomorrow's (today) classes in order to do my work.

It's that bad. Me and this management subject. I seriously need a whole year (like in foundation studies) to cope with it. I get it. But the amount of research involved to find out where you got a quote from or to justify your statement..man..the amount of periodicals I went through on Monash Australia's online library!

My Msn Messenger nick usually best reflects my mental state. Now it says.."Cel - 817 words - needs someone to complain to..". Thanks to Payal, Kiki and Radit for all the cheering up and advice. Payal could still give me a call at 1am (I put that nick at 3am but she called coz Eka asked her online why I wasn't online as usual) even though she had problems of her own while Kiki was struggling with his own management assignment and Radit was watching the Champions League match between Arsenal and PSV Eindhoven. Kiki made me laugh when he said that I can't be panicking and in doubt of my potential - because I'm everybody's role model and that I taught everybody everything. That may be true for Economics, English, Bizstats and Accounting...but not Management. Surely not Management.

I'm still laughing at the role model thingy. Thanks Kiki for making me actually laugh during the nite. And Radit for chatting to me about stuff other than assignments during the day. And Payal for calling.

I'm confused. His feelings. Sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel is as bright as sunshine. Sometimes it's dark. Some people say he's very blur. Some people say that they think of him as the sly type, look blur but knows more than meets the eye. If there was anything going on between us and he just didn't know how to make the 1st move, I just handed him a perfect opportunity to get the ball rolling and he pushed it away. So should there be a ball rolling in the 1st place?

Now it's making me confused about my own feelings. Should I continue this chase?

Waiting for God Put A Smile Upon My Face to finish downloading. Bayern Munich is battling it out with Deportivo La Coruna on the telly in front of me. Oh! Makaay from Deportivo just scored... isn't it nice to know that you are reading a text that was written when the goal was scored? *imagines the anger seething from Bayern's fans* Hehehe.. Ballack is wearing red. Woot woOt.

What have I been doing the past week? Nothing really. Other than researching for my Management assignment. Got the go ahead from my lecturer to include the Arthur Andersen - Enron case. You don't know what's it all about, don't you? Don't worry. I got no energy to blabber on it. It was on the news for 6 months or so..duhh. And I got interested in it (just to explain my geekiness) because I wanted to work with A. Andersen in an accounting-related job when I graduated. So lalala.

Radit gave me a nice bit of interesting news yesterday. Seems that my final exam papers are on the 29th, 30th, 31st of October and the last would be on the 6th of November. What's so interesting about it? Well..

- I didn't know about it
- Radit is in a different course than me
- With Monash starting probably in early March, this means I have close to 4 months of holz
- What the hell? 3 consecutive days of exams? *faints*
- I can learn a musical instrument (preferably guitar/drums), a language, work part-time and do summer school...
- oh and go on a vacation. Been invited to Maldives and Indonesia. But..no money :(
- I can probably lose LOTS of weight before next semester? Haha

*clicks here and there* Yayy the song is finished. I don't think I can stay awake for the whole game. I'll let Radit tell me all about it in coll tomoro then. Oh and I chopped 2 inches off my hair today and went for the permanent filling from the dentist before that. The hair is still bushy. It'll alwiz be. But I love my curls *smiles*

A news article that caught my eye today, courtesy of New Straits Times…

Eurasians marinating in all cultures for 500 years.
Of course this caught my eye, duhh. This is the New Sunday Times’ 1st installment on minority groups in Malaysia, and besides talking about my race, it also took a look at the Sikhs. While there wasn’t much new info, I guess its our responsibility to remind society at large of our existence, no? There was, however, one quote from a fellow Eurasian which brought a smile to my face – “Malaysians always want to know what race a person is, and we get them stumped because we don’t fit into their traditional idea of race: Malay, Chinese, or Indian,” says Darren Pedley, 35, a Eurasian of English descent. Now this is so true. Very. When people see/hear me, they think – Malay. When they see the cross hanging on my neck (a sign of Christianity), they ask, “What race are you?” to which I answer Eurasian. This doesn’t close the book, mind you. They’d ask, “Yea, but what? Chinese, Malay or Indian??” Last time, I used to proudly explain that I was from a French-Filipino-British-Portuguese background, which sounds very unique in a 15 year old girl’s mind. Now, I’d just go “Oh, I got Portuguese blood,” just to escape the millions of questions that would follow suit from the previous answer. Yes, the Malaysian population at large does have a mindset as to what it considers a race – Malay, Chinese or Indian – BUT they also do have a fixed view on what is considered Eurasian – Portuguese descent. Dare to speak more and prepare to get bombarded with questions that will rack your brain of how to answer your own lineage.

I’m lucky that Papa settled down with Mummy (the Portuguese-British source), so I can at least get away with answering Portuguese, but my other cousins aren’t that lucky I guess. The ones in Penang and Malacca have it easy, too, since the concentration of Eurasians in those places are far better than that of dear old Kuala Lumpur. And seeing that I didn’t attend one of those Top 10 socially elite high schools in KL made explaining myself a little bit harder. But I guess I did bring a little bit of colour into my own high school’s, Sekolah Aminuddin Baki, history, hehehe. Now everybody knows what a Eurasian is, and even the juniors who came in after I left seem to know my name, as I just found out from an ex-classmate whose younger sister is studying there now. Seems that my name is mentioned when they are taught about the emergence of Eurasians in Tanah Melayu in Form 1 History, or when the Girl Guides teacher advisors tell the present batch of members of how excited we were for being picked to represent the national society in its debut in Malaysia’s National Day marching parade in 1997. Usually, like Scouts or Red Crescent, the marching contingent is made up of members from different schools, but the GG society decided to take our whole school troop to the parade, and since I was the Head of Marching then, I was somewhat, in charge (Troop leaders are not supposed to meddle in marching activities because it has its own head of division). Also, quite a number of my ex-classmates’ siblings are studying there now, so they know me, and their friends too, since they can see me at Hari Raya, Chinese New Year and Deepavali open house parties every year when we, the ’98 batch get together.

Bang me if you like, but seriously, I take it as an achievement. To be known. Not to be known as in like those popular idols, but to be known as a Eurasian. Awhile back, on a visit to Sunway Lagoon with Yean Ee and Eka, there was this one time where I decided to have a rest while those two went on a ride. Three unknown-to-me girls came out of the ride, saw me, and smiled. They came by and before anything else, apologized profusely because they didn’t know how to greet me but through the term “Kakak Serani” ( Eurasian elder-sister ). I laughed, because only SABians juniors called me Kakak/Kak, so I knew where they knew me from, and proceeded to tell them that my name was Celeste. After all the How-are-you, what-are-you-doing-now chit chat, I finally asked them “How old are you guys?” Fifteen, they answered. Six years younger, meaning they entered SAB when I was in Upper Six. Oh my, how on earth did they know me? We were in completely separate sections of the school, with different recess times and different end-of-school times. They were Girl Guides. Ahhh. That explains it. I was a Lieutenant in GG when I did my Form Six, so I had to embroil myself in the weekly activities of both the Rangers(14-19yrs) and the GG (13-15yrs) and see to it that the youngsters were having fun hehe. Yean Ee and Eka, who saw me chatting to those girls from their ride, were surprised. Coz you see, I’m not so active in coll. Haha. I just go round doing my business, playing pool, now foozeball, sitting in the cafetaria, hanging out. Not a member of any association nor holding any posts, thank you. There’s a few SABian juniors in my coll, doing A-Levels and Canadian Matriculation, who found me while I was hanging out in the cafetaria a few months back. Sometimes, they help remind me of my SAB days (one was a GG while the other was a Scout). Which is fine by me *smiles*.

I totally lost track of what I intended to say…but that’s me, I guess. Hehe.

Guess what? On Monday, I had this monstrous toothache during my last lecture, Malaysian Studies. The day I didn’t bring any bag to coll (just a file) and no panadol on me…it had to be the most unbearable toothache ‘session’ (been having small jabs of pain the past 2 weeks). Gah. I really couldn’t stand it, so Sara and me went down to the bookshop to buy panadol, and u know what? It was 6.30pm, so bookshop closed. Dang. I sat in the cafetaria as I tried to think where to get panadol. Ahh..ask those hostel people! Called up Eka – she didn’t have any but she suggested Radit since he’s like forever sick. So I called Radit. Thank God he had. He was on the way to Pyramid though, so he asked his roommate Kiki to pass it to me. Good. I sat through the last of the lecture then walked in a hurry to the hostel, with Aishath and Sara in tow. Hehe. Popped by the 3rd floor for the panadol, popped by the 12th floor for a glass of water, and soon Aishath and me were walking back towards home and bus stop respectively. Sat at the bus stop and my tooth was still painful. Popped another pill. Geez.

My ass was home by 9.30pm. Ate dinner like as though I hadn’t had a bite for days. As my mind was just thinking of getting food into my stomach so that I could pop another pill, I couldn’t exactly savour the food in front of me, now could I? So I popped. Did a bit of homework, did some work on the Tuteman (a computing program for BizStats) and went online for about an hour. Then whammm! The pain was back. The way I was bending over in my seat, you’d think I was deprived of air or something. Offlined myself, popped another pill and quietly but painfully stumbled into bed. Oh please let me fall asleep easily. I did :p

Mum woke me up at 6am, which is the usual time I must wake up for classes on Tuesday. Without opening my eyes, I told her I’m not going to classes today and went back to sleep. Duly woke up at ..what?..12pm. Bummed around the house pain-free and did some housework, including washing my terrapin’s aquarium. Mum called at 4pm, asking if it was still painful, to which I said no. She said we’ll go to the dentist together the next day (today, Wednesday)…coz you see..heh…I’m scared of dentists like people who are afraid of heights of heights…and so on and so forth. Why? I don’t blady hell know. I’ve only visited a dentist once before, when someone knocked into my left side and caused my molar to break….then there were those compulsory dental visits in school. So I’m afraid of something I don’t know. Perhaps. Another reason could be that I have a perfect set of teeth (I’m told by many)…so a visit to a dentist could mean the end of that statement’s warranty? Haha.

So today, I got up, called papa who picked me up, and went. Even stepped into the dentist’s office alone as papa tried to find a parking space in overcrowded Ampang Point. Nobody was there. So? I’m next. Duhh. Gave papa a reassuring call that I’ll be fine and I went in. …….And I came out! ……. Done! :p

The verdict:
I had a hole ( I knew of it ) in the last molar on the upper right. Seems the hole was there for quite some time and I must’ve ate something hard, so my tooth broke away. She filled it up temporarily and told me to come back next week. If…my tooth wasn’t causing pain anymore, she’d permanently fill it up. If….it was however, then I have the choice of either having it pulled, or having the nerve killed. So there, I have a filling now. And it’s YUCKY!! It has this chili hotness about it, and it’s YUCKY!! The receptionist said it taste like “Cengkih” – a type of spice…don’t know what’s the English word for it, anyone? But its YUCKY!!!! Yuck yuck yuck. If I eat anything on my right now, when I swallow it, it tastes yucky!!!!!

Thanks to everyone who sms-ed me and wished me well. Haha. I had to keep my inbox free for all the messages that were coming through. And thanks for all the personal dentist stories ….especially Cindy, who at 11am this morning, as soon as I went online before my dental visit, told me how she had her 4 molars pulled for her braces, and how all the blood splurted onto the dentist’s mask. SHEESH!

The past one week, I haven't had any assignments due. BizStats is only due on the 20th, Management 27th and Accounting is after the break. And I actually found myself B-O-R-E-D. Like say whhhaaaaattt???

The others complained too. It's so weird la. Even Mr. Suhaizal banged us abit in the community site..haha..saying we are addicted to assignments already. I am so not!! It's just that for 1 week, there was nothing on our minds except for Economics and Accounting, and suddenly, there's nothing.

Lucky my ass that the college has decided to let online games be played on their server, so nowadays I mostly find myself playing Y! Pool with my hostellite friends, namely Radit and Eka. I don't even logged into ICQ haha...coz when I do, and start chatting with people, I realised that I got no mood to chat. So to those who missed me in ICQ, sorry ah. Damon, if you are reading this, sorry but my non-chat moods also includes Y! Messenger. It, however, excludes my coll friends. I suppose it's because they know what happened during the day and so don't have the need to ask me how I'm doin? And we mostly talk about what happened/studies/bitch bout other people that we know. Hahaha. Hmm...just have to wait and see when will this phase end.

Does the words Union Carbide ring a bell in your ears? How about Bhopal?

It didn’t in mine too, well not until last Friday. As the others and I turned every page in every Management book that dealt with social responsibility, I realized that I saw the words said beforehand many a time till it got stuck in my head. Sara put it aptly…”Why is my head ringing with the words Union Carbide?” or something to that effect.

Short trip to the past…
18 years ago a major chemical disaster occurred in Bhopal, India and the chemical plant involved was Union Carbide. I don’t know the details as to when, how, why and what…but that doesn’t make me ignorant. Facts don’t account for better understanding. I am 21, but have never come across these words or anything even remotely related with the topic at hand. If it was that small of a matter, why all those mentions in the Management books under the chapter “Social Responsibility”?

Then this morning I opened the papers and found myself reading an article titled “Spare A Little Prayer For The Forgotten Victims of Bhopal Chemical Disaster” in the Science section of the NST. As I read, I realized that my lack of knowledge on the matter was solely because the world never really talked about it in the years that succeeded the incident. Not until recently that is. As everybody is getting all their knickers in a twist over the September 11 first year anniversary, the environmental activists out there are trying to remind the world of a responsibility they forgot. Yes, there is a warrant of arrest for the CEO of Union Carbide for his involvement in the matter, yet he is reportedly living a very comfortable rich life with his wife. Not holed up like Osama, but living in full view of the public. And it seems that the intensity of the after-effects of the Bhopal incident far outweighs that of the September 11. Ahh, you have come to realized where I’m heading with this entry, haven’t you?

Right now, my head is just filled with words and assumptions that may relate to each other, yet I can’t quite put them down in a grammatically correct order.

- social responsibility - world is a firm - September 11 – more profitable – major power house – Bhopal – in India – biggest slum? – profit of pursuing the matter? -

Mind you, all these entered my head once I put down that article. Plus the fact that I’m doing an assignment regarding social responsibility.

A long time since I really ‘blogged’ right? J

Stayed at Fitri’s last night because she needed some help in preparing for her Economics test today. Eka didn’t know I was there and since Fitri was gonna go have dinner with Eka, Radit and the gang later that night, I thought I’d make it a surprise haha. But then halfway through my dead sleep, at around 7pm, Eka rang me up and asked me where I was. Haih. Might as well tell la. Fated. Haha. So awhile later I left a sleeping Fitri and visited Eka in the hostel. When it was time, Eka, Radit, Kiki, Kenny, Johan, Fitri, Tata, me and another guy walked to RSB for dinner. Even bumped into Abe and later, Aishath on the way. Goodness gracious me. Abe and his friends later came to the same restaurant too. Believe me, Sunway is not that small.

Popped by the hostel to get a shirt from Eka and Fitri’s notes from Radit. I entered at 10pm, which was supposed to be the time for all visitors to leave. Left at 10.30pm, but guess what? Eka called me like 20 mins later saying that a guard came by her place inquiring if I was still there. Hahaha…such security!

Not even 20 mins in Fitri’s place, Becky calls. She was in MidValley with Shawn and was heading towards my place in Ampang for supper! Haiyor, I told her I was in Sunway….and so…she came all the way to Sunway. And guess who’s in the backseat of the car? Abe. Nono..believe me when I say, Sunway is not that small. So me and Fitri followed them to Ming Tien for drinks. Harrr…Becky seems to love the sentence “Why Sunway is so dead huh?” I swear, if I got a ringgit everytime she said it, I’d be rich. My mood wasn’t really up too, since I just found out that Tata had received the news of her younger brother’s death during dinner earlier. So I let all the banging go through my way that nite. Later at Fitri’s place, when we were going through Economics too, the mood was sombre.

Woke up this morning at 8am for a 9am class. Such bliss of living in the condo in front of the college. After class, helped Fitri with her stuff again before I joined the others for BizStats lecture at 12. Wasn’t interested. Rather read Eka’s programming textbook which had a chapter on Adobe Elements. My phone was off, because I was trying to conserve the last bar I had, so I didn’t notice till later that Radit had sms-ed me asking me to stop reading and listen to the lecture hahaha. Nah, it’s ok. She’s my lab tutor too, so I already learned a bit of the lecture during lab class the day before. Oh Aishath gave each of us this glass paperweight thingy which had a crab inside. From Maldives, her home. Everytime I was bored, I’d take someone else’s paperweight and start a crab fight. Haha.

Me, Aishath and Sara left coll straight away for Pyramid to accompany Eka for her haircut, well not before I bumped into Michelle in front of the Finance Department. I have wonderful timing haha. Oh yes, Eka is that baby-ish. As loud as she can be, she’s also shy. How surprising. I sat with Eka throughout the whole session while Sara and Aishath had their lunch in Pyramid and brought some McD’s for me. The haircut seems ok. Thank god. Then we headed back to coll at 3 because Eka and Aishath had their BizStats lab (and Sara skipped it haha). Sara joined Isil in the library to do some research for the dreadful Management assignment while I hung out in the Monash labs for awhile. When Aishath was done with her lab, we joined the researchers too, hehe. Took us awhile to understand what was going on as we found ourselves drowned in books and more books on the lovely topic of Management. Isil, Sara, then Shazana left which left me and Aishath to continue the work. We got stuck in coll because of the storm, and since papa could only pick me up at 8.30pm, we continued our research before heading off for dinner. Then papa came and I came home and zonked out for an hour before getting up to watch CSI on tv.

Tadaaaa…

I just got Adobe Photoshop 7.0 installed...and tinkered with it. I'm so lost in it but yea...will take some time. So far, I created this brush.

See what Care Bear you are.

MTV Artiste Of The Month - Coldplay!!

The only good news I've heard all day long as I sat in front of my computer trying to finish my economics and accounting assignments on time. Due at 5, and I'm still finetuning the accounting work. Bah.